Monday, September 7th TV listings for E! Entertainment USA - Eastern Feed
Two and a Half Men Kinda Like Necrophilia
Alan seeks revenge when he discovers that Charlie stole his high-school girlfriend.
Two and a Half Men Meander to Your Dander
Charlie offers Alan pointers on how to break up with a woman.
Two and a Half Men A Little Clammy and None Too Fresh
Rose comes back from England and takes care of sick Charlie in a very strange way.
Two and a Half Men The Soil Is Moist
Alan's date, who happens to be a friend of his ex, reveals a secret about Judith's sex life.
Two and a Half Men Winky-Dink Time
Charlie goes on a double date with Jake and sets Alan up with a prostitute; Charlie runs into trouble when he can't remember his date's name.
Two and a Half Men Rough Night in Hump Junction
Alan fears that Charlie's womanizing is getting out of control.
Two and a Half Men The Last Thing You Want Is to Wind Up With a Hump
Charlie and Alan meet several women while attending one of Jake's soccer games.
Two and a Half Men Twenty-Five Little Pre-Pubers Without a Snoot-Ful
Charlie realizes Jake's classmates know the words to all of his jingles, and he is inspired to craft the fourth-grade musical with unusual results.
Two and a Half Men A Bag Full of Jawea
Charlie tries to save Jake from school suspension by romancing his teacher, but the results are unfortunate.
Two and a Half Men Bad News From the Clinic
Charlie meets his match when he falls for a woman who is better at playing hard to get than he is.
Two and a Half Men Can You Eat Human Flesh With Wooden Teeth?
Judith leaves Jake with Alan and Charlie while she spends a week in Hawaii, and the guys find that caring for Jake on a daily basis is much different from weekend visits.
Two and a Half Men Does This Smell Funny to You?
Charlie unknowingly sleeps with an elderly man's (Orson Bean) hot trophy wife.
Two and a Half Men Principal Gallagher's Lesbian Lover
Alan must see the school principal over a picture Jake drew of a schoolmate and calls Charlie to watch over the boy.
Two and a Half Men That Voodoo That I Do Do
Charlie cons Jake into taking ballet lessons in order to get close to the teacher.
Two and a Half Men And the Plot Moistens
Alan finds that he has more in common with Jake's teacher than with Kandi; Charlie helps Jake prepare a song for his audition for the school musical.
Two and a Half Men Just Once With Aunt Sophie
Charlie and Alan help Jake prepare for his first boy-girl party.
Two and a Half Men It Never Rains in Hooterville
After realizing that Jake's childhood is almost over, Alan makes a last-minute try at father-son bonding; Kandi embarks on a new career.
Two and a Half Men Mr. McGlue's Feedbag
Jake has a windfall when Charlie takes him to the track; Alan finds himself stuck at the Department of Motor Vehicles.
Two and a Half Men Large Birds, Spiders and Mom
Charlie and Alan try to prepare Jake for his first day of junior high.
Two and a Half Men If My Hole Could Talk
Charlie discovers he is attracted to an older woman who writes self-help books; Jake and Alan fight over a school assignment.
Two and a Half Men A Jock Strap in Hell
The guys run into Jake's former teacher (Alicia Witt) who became a stripper after a fling with Charlie; Charlie gives her a room and a job to try and help her out, but things get out of control.
Two and a Half Men He Smelled the Ham, He Got Excited
When Evelyn offers to pay for Jake's college education, Alan wonders if he ever needs to work again.
Two and a Half Men For the Sake of the Child
After they embarrass him in public, Jake refuses to stay with Charlie and Alan.
Two and a Half Men Big Girls Don't Throw Food
Alan helps Walden get ready for a date with Bridget (Judy Greer); Jake decides to drop out of school like Walden did.
Two and a Half Men Those Fancy Japanese Toilets
Jake has feelings for his chemistry tutor, but she has a crush on Walden; Alan becomes obsessed with the journal his brother left him in his will.
Two and a Half Men Oh Look! Al-Qaeda!
Jake graduates and must decide what to do with his life.
How I Met Your Mother Coming Back
Robin wonders how Barney will react when James reveals that he is getting divorced; Marshall tries to get to New York in time for the wedding.
How I Met Your Mother Last Time in New York
Lily becomes frustrated that she is the only one who knows about Ted's plans; Barney and Robin try to spend time together before their relatives arrive for the wedding.
How I Met Your Mother The Broken Code
After learning that Ted still has feelings for Robin, Barney tries to work through his anger; Lily comes to a realization.
How I Met Your Mother The Poker Game
Lily helps Barney when he must pick a side in a fight between his mother and Robin; Marshall and Ted get into an argument over wedding gifts and thank-you notes.
How I Met Your Mother Knight Vision
Ted chooses poorly when deciding who will be his date for the wedding weekend; Barney and Robin have a problem with the minister; Marshall learns more about his driving companion.
How I Met Your Mother No Questions Asked
Marshall asks the gang to help remove an upsetting text message from Lily's phone before she sees it.
How I Met Your Mother The Lighthouse
Barney is caught in the middle of Robin and Loretta's conflict; Marshall and Daphne discover a stowaway on their road trip; Ted and Cassie visit a lighthouse.
How I Met Your Mother Platonish
During a flashback, the gang wonders how the Ted, Robin and Barney love triangle will play out; Barney accepts challenges from Robin and Lily.
How I Met Your Mother Mom and Dad
Barney concocts a plan when his father (John Lithgow) arrives at the hotel; Ted thinks he is being framed when a wedding-related duty gets messed up.
How I Met Your Mother Bedtime Stories
Marshall tries to get Marvin to sleep by reciting rhyming bedtime stories.
How I Met Your Mother The Rehearsal Dinner
Robin is dismayed when Barney wants to have their rehearsal dinner at a laser tag arena; Ted aggravates Lily by not following through with a promise.
How I Met Your Mother Bass Player Wanted
A man at the wedding intentionally stirs up trouble; Marshall finally arrives at the Farhampton Inn.
How I Met Your Mother Slapsgiving No. 3: Slappointment in Slapmarra
Marshall tells a story about the Slap of a Million Exploding Suns as he tries to deliver a final, devastating slap to Barney.
How I Met Your Mother Unpause
Robin and Ted try to get Barney to reveal secrets after he drinks too much; Marshall tries to avoid fighting with Lily.
How I Met Your Mother How Your Mother Met Me
The mother reveals how she met Ted and what she has been doing over the past eight years.
How I Met Your Mother Sunrise
Robin and Ted reminisce about past relationships as they search for a drunken Barney on the day of the wedding; Lily and Marshall come to a resolution; Barney befriends two men who are eager to meet women.
How I Met Your Mother Rally
The gang must figure out how to make the Stinson Hangover Fixer Elixir to help Barney recover on the day of the wedding.
How I Met Your Mother Vesuvius
Robin and Lily have a fight on the morning of the wedding; Barney can't decide what suit to wear; the gang watch a movie that Ted didn't want them to see.
How I Met Your Mother Daisy
Marshall asks Barney and Ted for help figuring out where Lily went in the middle of the night during their argument.
How I Met Your Mother Gary Blauman
The members of the gang try to remember an encounter with Gary Blauman when he shows up at the wedding.
How I Met Your Mother The End of the Aisle
With only a half an hour left before the wedding, Robin and Barney panic; Lily and Marshall rewrite their wedding vows.
How I Met Your Mother Last Forever, Part 1
Ted's kids hear the end of the story of how he met their mother.